[00:00:01] Jessica: Hey, friend. Welcome to Perspectives into Practice, a place where life's stories meet practical wisdom. Together, we'll explore how faith filled perspectives can transform the way we live, love, and grow.
So grab a seat, settle in, and join us on this journey to turn inspiration into action.
Let's dive in.
Hey, friend. Welcome back to Perspectives into Practice. I am so glad that you're here today. I think that this is one of those conversations that's going to meet us right where we are, because we're talking about waiting, trusting, and learning how to truly surrender things to God. But if I'm being honest, this is something that sounds simple, but it's not always easy to live out. It's one thing to say I trust God, and it's another thing to actually hand something over to him, especially when it's been sitting heavy on our hearts for a while.
So if you've ever found yourself holding onto something longer than you should, or trying to figure it out on your own before finally going, okay, God, I need you, this conversation is really going to encourage you. I'm here with my new friend, Stephanie, and what I love about her is just how honest she is with her walk with God. She's not trying to have all the perfect words or perfect answers. She's just sharing what it looks like to trust him and in real life, in real situations. And I think there's something so refreshing about that. Welcome, Stephanie. I'm so glad that you're here.
[00:01:37] Stephanie: Oh, thank you so much, Jessica. I can't tell you what a joy it is to be with you today. I love your podcast and your mission, your heart.
[00:01:47] Jessica: Oh, thank you. Thank you. So before we dive in, y' all know I love a good fun fact. And Stephanie, I heard that you used to call yourself a fun football widow and now you're a full on fan. So I'm gonna need. I'm not a football person, so I'm gonna need you to tell us a story because I. I love this transition so much.
[00:02:09] Stephanie: Well, I was born and raised in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, a rabid sports town.
And, you know, I'm a wife, married 43 years to my high school sweetheart, Brashar.
We have a wonderful son, Michael, who just turned 40 years old. And for the first 20 years of our marriage, I was a football widow.
My husband has always loved the game with a passion, and I, on the other hand, absolutely no interest whatsoever.
But in 2006, I was diagnosed with a rare and aggressive form of breast cancer.
And during the chemotherapy treatments, I experienced brain swelling and cognitive challenges.
I was still an attorney at the time. I was a partner in a major national law firm.
[00:03:13] Jessica: Oh, my goodness.
[00:03:14] Stephanie: I was determined to keep my mind sharp.
[00:03:18] Jessica: Yeah.
[00:03:18] Stephanie: And so I decided to intentionally learn something completely new. My husband bought me the book Football for Dummies.
[00:03:33] Jessica: And thanks, husband.
[00:03:35] Stephanie: I. I started studying the game as brain exercise.
[00:03:40] Jessica: Yeah.
[00:03:41] Stephanie: And really, what began as therapy turned into a genuine love for the sport.
And so now I am proud to say I am a die hard Philadelphia Eagles fan.
And yes, with my husband, I now yell at the television with full confidence.
But, you know, our shared love of the game has brought us closer together.
And an ideal date night for us is having dinner together, watching the Eagles play.
And, you know, this always makes me smile because it reminds me that even in the hard seasons, God can surprise you with unexpected joy.
[00:04:30] Jessica: Yes, he can.
[00:04:31] Stephanie: Yes. And, you know, my faith and health journey began with that cancer diagnosis in 2006.
It was a 20 year journey through cancer, chronic illness, ongoing health challenges.
But by God's grace, I am here with you today. I am 20 years cancer free.
[00:04:54] Jessica: Praise the Lord.
[00:04:55] Stephanie: Yes.
[00:04:56] Jessica: Yeah.
[00:04:57] Stephanie: I will say that in 2025, I entered a very different season. And it's a season that I'm still walking through today.
[00:05:06] Jessica: Yeah, I can't wait to dive into that. I love that story so much that what could have just continued to bring you down into despair.
You chose to look into something else to help to heal your brain. And now it's brought you and your husband closer. Like, I don't know. I don't know if anyone would have ever thought, hmm, when I get this diagnosis, this I'm gonna learn about football. But God is just so precious in his way that he brings us together and brings that joy out of really hard situations. And I love that he gave you something so unexpected to hold onto. And that, of course, brings us to exactly what we're going to be talking about today. And it connects so beautifully, because healing doesn't look like just restoration. Sometimes it really does look like God meeting us in the middle of it. And so I want to start at the beginning so we can really understand your journey. So what happened in your health? You began to tell us a little bit that really, really changed everything for you.
[00:06:13] Stephanie: Well, Jessica, as I said, I'm in a new season. And on February 18, 2025, my heart just stopped by God's grace. I was in my doctor's office at the time.
[00:06:31] Jessica: Oh, my goodness.
[00:06:32] Stephanie: In fact, the Eagles had just won the Super Bowl.
I had my paraphernalia on.
[00:06:41] Jessica: Oh, My goodness.
[00:06:42] Stephanie: I was joyful. It was a routine appointment. I was getting a regular treatment.
My heart just stopped.
I survived 55,0 minutes of CPR.
[00:06:59] Jessica: Oh, my goodness.
[00:07:00] Stephanie: Because my doctor's entire state staff did the CPR rotation, they would not give up on me.
When my doctor tells the story, he said it was witnessed.
I saw her die.
Wow. That. That moment of clinical death was not just another medical crisis. No. It was the divine resurrection.
50 minutes.
And it became a divine redirection into an extended season of uncertainty that I am continuing to walk through today.
[00:07:43] Jessica: Yeah.
[00:07:44] Stephanie: That moment, it stripped away my physical health. Yeah. My emotional health and mindset were turbulent.
My spiritual health was fragile. More, my life was fully, completely in the palm of God's hands.
I had extensive thoracic surgery to repair the wonderful work done by the cpr.
[00:08:11] Jessica: Yes.
[00:08:13] Stephanie: Multiple broken ribs, fractured sternum, collapsed and punctured lungs.
I spent 12 days, 12, 13, 14 days on a ventilator. Oh, my goodness. I spent a month in intensive care.
I was then transferred to an acute residential rehabilitation facility for another month. And when I finally came home, the seasons had changed from winter to spring, and I. I was not returning to the life I had before.
[00:08:51] Jessica: Yeah.
[00:08:51] Stephanie: So for. For several months, I had intensive daily in home speech, physical, occupational therapy. I had to relearn how to breathe, to speak, to swallow, to function day by day. And even now, over a year later, I'm still in the recovery.
I still struggle with memory loss and pain and fatigue. And this is not something I went through like my cancer journey. This is something I am still walking through.
And what's been most significant is not just the physical, mental, spiritual, emotional recovery process.
[00:09:35] Jessica: Yeah.
[00:09:35] Stephanie: But what God is showing me in the middle of it all.
And, you know, physically, my strength and energy levels are still limited in ways I've never experienced before.
[00:09:48] Jessica: Yeah.
[00:09:48] Stephanie: There are moments now when I have to stop. Not because I want to, but because my body requires it. And emotionally and mentally, my mind, will and emotions are still impacted in ways I've never experienced before.
There are moments now when I have to surrender. Not because I want to, but because my soul requires it. And spiritually, my spirit has felt crushed in ways I've never experienced before.
But there are moments now where I have to be still. Not because I want to, but because my spirit requires it.
And in those moments, I face a choice.
To be frustrated or to be aware, to focus on what I cannot do or to recognize what God is doing right now.
[00:10:42] Jessica: Yeah.
[00:10:43] Stephanie: And I just. I love Psalm 27:13.
I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.
[00:10:53] Jessica: That's right. That's right.
[00:10:56] Stephanie: A recent moment stands out to me. It was a small but deeply meaningful, deeply powerful moment when I saw God's goodness and felt his presence very strongly in my life. I was taking a shower. Something we all take for granted.
[00:11:13] Jessica: Yeah.
[00:11:14] Stephanie: Now, over a year ago in the hospital, I could not even take a shower.
Then, in the rehabilitation facility, I graduated to supervised seated showers.
[00:11:27] Jessica: Yes.
Yes.
[00:11:29] Stephanie: Months later, when I came home, I still needed special equipment and assistance to take a shower. I struggled to lift my arms because of all of the work done.
[00:11:42] Jessica: Yeah.
[00:11:42] Stephanie: But in that shower, I realized I was standing on my own.
I could lift my arms over my head.
And I lifted them, Jessica, not just to wash my hair, but to praise the Lord.
You know, that may seem simple, but for me, it was not. Because I knew all the prayer, the pain, the work that it took to get me to that moment.
And in that moment, I sensed God teaching me to honor little by little, progress.
[00:12:22] Jessica: Yeah.
[00:12:23] Stephanie: Like. Like the Israelites going into promised land. Little by little. Yes. For years, you know, I've encouraged women to pursue health and wholeness patiently. Now God is teaching me.
[00:12:39] Jessica: Yes.
[00:12:39] Stephanie: To live with patient endurance.
Yeah.
[00:12:43] Jessica: And there's. That's different.
[00:12:46] Stephanie: Yes. And his healing is not dramatic every day.
Sometimes it's just that faithfulness in taking the next small step, what I had viewed as small progress or slow progress is, in reality, steady progress.
[00:13:03] Jessica: Yes.
[00:13:04] Stephanie: And so that moment was about not what I had regained.
It was about gaining clarity, gaining perspective as to how far I had come. Yeah. And he was teaching me gratitude in the middle of these limitations.
And that's humbling and beautiful at the same time.
[00:13:26] Jessica: Oh, for sure.
[00:13:27] Stephanie: That has helped me see myself, my life, in a completely different way.
So in. In this season of recovery, God is teaching me that his healing often happens in quiet, unseen ways. Many mornings, I still feel physically limited and fatigued and frustrated. I want to do more than my body can handle. But when I am still, I sense the Lord speaking to me, gently reminding me, I am with you in this season.
[00:14:01] Jessica: Yeah.
[00:14:01] Stephanie: I am leading you. And I have called you to serve in a different way, a new way. Yeah. And he whispers, your worth is not measured by your performance.
Your worth is in me. Your identity is not rooted in your physical output.
Your identity is in me.
And in those still moments, he draws me close to him and he guides me to shift my focus from my circumstances to my Creator.
And as I seek him, he invites me to rest not only physically, but emotionally, mentally, spiritually in him.
To trust that he's always working, especially when I don't see anything happening, and to trust that he's working all things together.
Together. All things for my good. For your good and the closed doors.
[00:15:07] Jessica: Yeah.
[00:15:07] Stephanie: So he meets me in those moments, not when I'm strong, but when I'm weak, when I'm humble, when I'm honest.
So I know that when I cry out to him in desperation, he hears me. And I experience that personally day by day.
He is my strength in my weakness. He is the one who sustains me when I can sustain myself.
And he carries me where I can't go on my own. So he has. He's helping me confront something very real.
Trusting God is not about trusting him to do what I expect, right, or what I hope for, or even what I pray for. It's trusting that he is in control.
[00:16:01] Jessica: Yeah.
[00:16:02] Stephanie: It's always trusting his love for me, trusting his divine plan and purpose for my life.
[00:16:08] Jessica: Yeah.
[00:16:09] Stephanie: Trusting his will, his way, his timing, trusting his character, especially when life unfolds differently than I would choose. He is still good. He is still faithful. He is still sovereign. Even when healing is prolonged.
Delayed healing does not mean that God is absent. Doesn't mean he's not working, doesn't mean he's forgotten me.
God is present in the process, not just in a miracle. So in this season, he is leading me from a life of striving to a life of surrender, from control to trust, from pressure to peace.
And that is where the true healing begins in body, soul, and spirit. Yes, there's.
[00:17:01] Jessica: I mean, we could just stop right there. I'm not going to. But that was.
[00:17:05] Stephanie: There's just.
[00:17:05] Jessica: There's so much, so many beautiful nuggets that we talk about all throughout the. Each of our podcasts and each of these episodes and conversations with our friends that, you know, trust is. Is an everyday, active process that we have to do.
And, you know, I mean, so many of the. I mean, you said so many amazing nuggets and how when we see healing or hope to have healing or, you know, are looking for that, a lot of times it's not what we hoped for, but it' exactly what we needed. And it looks a lot different than anything that we could have imagined, but it's exactly what the Lord wanted for us and that we can't be too quick to go, okay, Lord, heal me. Because there's so much learning and true healing, not just physical, but emotional and mental and spiritual that we get to Go through. Through this process. And I mean, there's. I just. I saw so many as you were speaking, so many of my own.
So much of my own journey in what you were saying. And I remember when I first had my. My. My son, I. It was a very, very traumatic event. I almost died. It was very scary.
But I also had a shower graduation because I couldn't. I would pass out if I would stand up. And so I went from only sitting to, you know, having everyone else help me to being able to stand, but then having someone there. And so I felt like a child because I always had to have someone there. And I was so angry because I just wanted to do it myself to that point. I had been so independent, and everything had just been me. But what the Lord taught me through that. And I'm sure that. And this is probably what happened in years as well, because I hear it over and over, but in us not being able to do these things and other people wanting to bless us and wanting to help us if we continue to keep that, control ourselves and go, nope, I've got it. We're actually thwarting their blessing. Right. They want to bless us. They want to use their gifts that God has given us to help us.
And we're like, no, no, I got this. I got this. We don't got this.
And if you've ever had to have a shower graduation, you know that you don't got this because your body is going to do something that you had no plan for.
But the Lord, there's just so much beauty in.
In healing. And you're exactly right. Is that when you said that healing. Oh, what was the phrase it used to.
[00:19:51] Stephanie: It unfolds gradually, little by little.
[00:19:55] Jessica: It is so gradual. Yes, yes.
[00:19:57] Stephanie: Because he's doing a work in us. Yes. And just like with the Israelites, you're not always ready. Right. For the blessing, the miracle that has yet to manifest.
[00:20:12] Jessica: Yes.
[00:20:12] Stephanie: And he is preparing you.
[00:20:15] Jessica: He has not forgotten us. He's not leaving us broken just to prove a point or because we've done something.
He's teaching us. And if we take a moment, like you said, and be still and silent and surrender our will to his will, we really can see that. We can see more about his character, more about our own faults and goodness. We can learn about the gifts that he's given us. I mean, there's so many things that we can learn in the pain, in the brokenness.
Not just physically, but, you know, in this aspect, we're talking about physically, but in, you know, Emotional brokenness that if we allow ourselves to lean in, to lean in and ask him, what are you teaching me here? And we talk about that all the time here. Lord, what are you teaching me? What can I learn from this? What can I take away from this? What can I share with others, Others about this and not just, Lord, why won't you heal me yet? Lord, why am I still hurt? Which, you know what? Sometimes I am still like that. I mean, y' all can't see on the podcast, but I have a brace on my arm because my thumb decided to quit working, so I have to support it and give it some help. And I literally was stirring a bowl of chili, so I wasn't doing anything destructive. But sometimes my body just goes, yep, this piece isn't going to work. And I do act like a toddler sometimes and stop my feet and go, lord, I don't want to wear another brace.
As I. As I went to go find this one, I laid out all of my braces and I realized I have one for just about every single body part. And I had a little pity party because I don't want to feel like this. I don't feel like I'm old enough to feel like this. But looking at it, these are years old, decades old braces. So this hasn't been just at this point. This has been my whole life. But if we think about the braces that we need for body parts, also for real life circumstances, sometimes we just need the Lord to hold us up. Sometimes we feel so weak that we can't stand. And God puts people around us and communities around us, and he helps us to sustain in those seasons, because seasons don't last for forever, but we can learn from them if we choose to, or we can just continue to throw pity parties and not get anywhere else and still be in pain.
So it is absolutely, absolutely a choice.
So I want to ask you, what did God show you about your worth in this season? You know, we talked about the blessings and you mentioned that, you know, now this season looks different and you can't do things that you used to be. And I'm sure that that has some play on, you know, what you were able to do and what your worth is back then and now. And so what. What has God showed you about that in this season?
[00:23:25] Stephanie: You know, God has been teaching me, I will say several things about him, but also about my. About myself first, as you mentioned, it's just been teaching me more and more about his character. Yeah, okay. About who he is. And I Don't know that we often focus enough on that.
[00:23:45] Jessica: Right.
[00:23:45] Stephanie: His, his power. Yeah, but he's loving, he's gracious, he's merciful, he's patient. And we should also be that way with ourselves.
And we often are not, you know, see ourselves, love ourselves as God loves us.
[00:24:05] Jessica: Yeah.
[00:24:07] Stephanie: He sees me, he hears me, he knows me better than I know myself.
[00:24:11] Jessica: Yeah.
[00:24:12] Stephanie: So he's not only the God of instantaneous miracles, He. He's the God who strengthens me to step into each day by faith, even in the middle. And I always look at it this way, middle of miracles, yet to manifest his miracles are on the way. But he's always working miracles and just trusting that he's with me and already knows what lies ahead. Yeah. But what he's been revealing to me about myself, you know, I am, I confess, a recovering perfectionist, used to being independent, self sufficient.
Right.
I can still be a driven overachiever. I like to serve, I like to produce.
You know, what? God is gently refining that in me. You know, we're refined in the fire.
[00:25:16] Jessica: Yes.
[00:25:17] Stephanie: You know, and he's teaching me that healthy boundaries and intimacy with him are more important than constant activity and busyness. Yes. You know, we want to do what we want to do when we want to do it.
[00:25:34] Jessica: Right.
[00:25:35] Stephanie: But this season is reshaping my understanding of stewardship and just caring for the body, soul and spirit he has entrusted to me as a temple of his holy Spirit.
[00:25:50] Jessica: Yeah.
[00:25:50] Stephanie: You know, so it's not about pushing harder, doing things my way, rushing ahead of God. It's about letting him continue to rebuild, build my temple, his way in this season so I can be fit to serve Him. You know, I. I see and celebrate progress, which I didn't always do.
I looked at my recovery and thought, this is too slow.
And I kept trying to push through rehabilitation.
I injured myself.
I had setbacks that took months to overcome. Yeah. Because I was impatient in the process.
But now I embrace that. What feels slow is still steady progress.
And that changes how I respond.
[00:26:43] Jessica: Yeah.
[00:26:44] Stephanie: And I'm learning how to live differently. Day by day, my body, soul and spirit are asking me to do something that has always been difficult for me.
To stop, to surrender, to be still. There are times when my body requires me to rest. My instinct is still to push through. But I'm learning to stop in a way that's new for me.
Not as something I earn, but as something I receive from God. The gift of restorative sleep.
Yes, right. Restorative stuff. Escape. There are moments when my Soul requires me to surrender. My instinct is still to push through, but I'm learning to surrender in a way that's new for me. It's allowing Christ, my prince of peace, to heal my brokenness, mind, will, emotions, and calm my inner storms. It's allowing him. And I'm learning to be still.
You know, when my spirit requires me to be still, my instinct is to push through, but I'm learning to be still in a way that's new to me and that is just cultivating closer communion with the Holy Spirit.
[00:28:03] Jessica: Yes.
[00:28:03] Stephanie: So I can hear his voice more clearly.
[00:28:07] Jessica: Yes.
[00:28:07] Stephanie: So stopping surrendering, being still have become acts of worship, acts of obedience, acts of gratitude, pacing myself, taking breaks, moving gently, breathing deeply, meditating on God's word. And that's required me to confront what I believe about my worth and my identity.
It's not measured by my performance. Performance.
My physical output.
[00:28:41] Jessica: Yeah.
[00:28:42] Stephanie: It's in Him. Yeah. You know, and ultimately this season is teaching me to trust God in a deeper, more intimate way. Not just in the outcome, but in the process and what has not yet been restored.
[00:28:59] Jessica: Yeah.
[00:28:59] Stephanie: And that's a different kind of trust.
[00:29:01] Jessica: It is, it is. And it's not always easy. It takes intention and forethought. Like, you have to actually, like exactly what you said. You have to be still. You have to surrender and just be intentional with your time with him and asking him questions. And I love that how you said exactly what you were doing. Because I was going to ask you, like, what, what. What does keep you focused on these things that you're like, I'm. I'm resting. I'm taking breaths. I'm think taking things slower. I'm, you know, prioritizing sleep, which, oh, my goodness, we should all be doing that. It is a hard one because we think, oh, well, this is just a passive thing that we do at night. But no, restorative sleep is literally what heals our bodies while we're doing nothing. Imagine that we can do nothing. And that is the most helpful thing that we can do is when we sleep. But that also takes to be able to get that. That takes time and planning because you can't just be on your phone until super late or have all the lights on or have constant input. You have to be very intentional again with your sleep to be able to get that restorative rest that does pursue healing to that point. And I love that this has just been. We could keep going on. Stephanie, I'm going to have to have you back so that we can keep talking. Because you're just. You have so many beautiful nuggets that I know that our friends can absolutely relate to.
So just. Just know friends. You're going to hear from Stephanie again. This is. This is definitely happening. Absolutely. So one of. I have a couple more questions for you, but, you know, for our friends listening, what would you say to someone who feels stuck in their healing right now? Because I'm sure that there's plenty of us that just need an encouragement for. For the next steps.
[00:31:04] Stephanie: You know, I understand what it feels like to walk through long and uncertain season, to have more questions than answers, to feel discouraged, to feel like you've tried everything thing and you're still not where you want to be. To love God deeply, but feel frustrated that your healing doesn't look the way you hoped it would.
So, you know, if you're walking through a long, hard season of uncertainty, please know that you're not alone.
God is always present with you.
Even now. Especially now. He's not absent from. From your situation. He meets you exactly where you are in your journey. Yes. Moment by moment. Not when you're strong, but when you are weary.
[00:31:56] Jessica: Yeah.
[00:31:57] Stephanie: When you let him know that you need Him.
And you know, scripture reminds us his power is made perfect in our weakness. Yes. So even if it hasn't happened way you expect it, it doesn't mean God isn't working right. You know, it just sometimes unfolds gradually.
It looks different than we imagined, but through it all, he is faithful. And, you know, I would just encourage you to take one small step of faith each day. Not from pressure. We put pressure on ourselves and, but from grace.
Because healing is not about your performance.
It's a process.
It's about God's healing process.
And he's with you every step.
[00:32:50] Jessica: So encouraging. So encouraging. I think that's, that's exactly what I know I needed to hear today. But I'm sure that our friends listening, that's what they needed to hear, too. Stephanie, thank you so much for sharing your heart today. I know that. I know for me, this has been such a meaningful conversation. And you will be back.
We're going to make this happen again. And I just know that it's encouraged so many of our friends listening. So as we wrap up, I want to ask you the question that I ask every guest on the podcast, and that is, what is one perspective that you would encourage listeners to apply today?
[00:33:24] Stephanie: Well, I would encourage anyone listening to apply this perspective. I call it two of the Adopt this mindset. Because it helps me day by day.
Even when.
Especially when you do not understand what God is doing.
You can trust who he is.
Yeah, you can trust his character.
You can trust that he's not only present in the miracle, but he's present in the process.
Present in the waiting.
Present in the uncertainty. And in those moments of doubt.
You can rest in him while he is working, assured that he is working all things together for your good according to his divine plan and purpose for your life.
Trust him in the process.
Stay anchored in his him and the unfailing promises in His Word. And never lose hope because he is always our hope.
Deuteronomy 31:8 is a powerful promise.
The Lord Himself goes before you and will be with you. He will never leave you or forsake you. Yes, Step into each day with the mindset. I am stepping into a day already prepared by God. I am not walking into uncertainty. I am walking into his plan and purpose and just keep walking with him one surrendered step at a time. So you know my heart for this conversation is not to present myself as someone who has arrived, but as someone who is still walking with God in real time and my journey continues.
[00:35:21] Jessica: Yeah.
So beautiful. So beautiful. Thank you for sharing that, friend. If you are listening today and you're in a season that feels slow or maybe even a little discouraging, I hope that this conversation reminded you that God is still present in every step. You don't have to rush the process.
You don't have to have it all figured out. You just have to keep walking with Him. Little by little, he is working.
If this episode encouraged you, I would love for you to share it with someone who might need it too. And if you've been listening and you feel like, hey, I have a story too. God has been doing something amazing in my life. I want to invite you to be a guest on the podcast. Reach out to
[email protected] I would love to to talk to you. And remember, even small shifts in perspective can lead to big changes. Now go put those perspectives into practice. Talk to you next time.
