Episode Transcript
[00:00:01] Speaker A: Hey, friend. Welcome to Perspectives into Practice, a place where life's stories meet practical wisdom. Together, we'll explore how faith filled perspectives can transform the way we live, love, and grow.
So grab a seat, settle in, and join us on this journey to turn inspiration into action.
Let's dive in foreign.
Welcome back to Perspectives into Practice. Today's conversation feels tender, it feels honest, and it might step on our toes just a little, but in the best way. My friend Desiree is back with us again. And if you've heard her before, you already know how thoughtful and grounded she is. She has this beautiful way of living her faith out loud. Not in perfection, but. But in obedience. And in this season, God has been asking her a question that stopped her in her tracks. A question that, honestly, I think he's asking many of us. Do you want to be well? Not just okay. Not just surviving, not just managing, but truly well. Today we're talking about physical health, spiritual health, surrender, obedience, and what it really means to live holy whole. Welcome. Desiree, I'm so glad that you're here.
[00:01:20] Speaker B: Hi. Thanks so much for having me back again. I'm excited to be here and to talk about this.
[00:01:25] Speaker A: So great. So great. Before we go any deeper, y' all know I love a good fun fact, and today's fun fact is that Desiree says that she used to play the flute and sing in the choir, even while wearing her hearing aids. And I. I just love that there's something just so powerful when someone chooses to step into music, even when hearing could be a challenge. But what was it like for you to be part of a music in that sc?
[00:01:49] Speaker B: Well, back then, it kind of. It gave me an opportunity to be in with some of the other kids and just to be a part of something. I think that was really exciting for me because with my hearing loss, I always felt outside of things, so. And it was a challenge. It was a practice in getting outside my comfort zone. But I loved playing the flute and I loved. I did the piano for a little bit, too, but just singing the choir, too. I mean, I don't know if I'd sing out loud at this point in life. It's so funny, the difference when we're kids and when we're grown up.
[00:02:20] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:02:20] Speaker B: But music now is so different, too, because I can hear it a different way. Yeah. Like back then I had my hearing aids, and now I have the cochlear implants, and it's a very. It can be a different sound, but I can listen to music so much better now, actually. I can hear it in a different way. And my relationship with music has changed. It's grown, it's gotten deeper. But the love for music was always there. That's kind of always been there. So. Yeah, I love that God has allowed me to keep hearing it.
[00:02:49] Speaker A: Yes, me too. And fun fact for me, I used to play flute. That was actually the very first instrument that I ever played, and I love it. So that that same resilience in. In learning, you know, music and. And learning through these different seasons has actually marked this entire season for you that you're going through, especially as you've walked through perimenopause and menopause and the complications of your cochlear implant mapping and changing, just trying to get your body regulated. So will you take us into that season and share with us what. What is going on?
[00:03:24] Speaker B: Well, it started probably about eight years ago when I started realizing what was happening and the changes that were happening. But when perimenopause started, it kind of came in like a lion for me. And, you know, no one talks about this. No one tells you, no one warns you. So I was kind of learning as I went. But it became another challenge with me, with my body, because I. I struggle. Listening is a lot of work for me, and it takes a lot of energy.
So the energy levels drop too, with perimenopause. So my energy was horrific on top of everything else, my moods, my. Just all the things going on. And it did mess with my cochlear implant mapping. It threw things off for me, so I was not hearing as well. I was struggling with the programming and I needed to get my body in the right place. I actually had to go without sound, some sounds for a while because. While I was figuring this out.
[00:04:25] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:04:26] Speaker B: And that was challenging for me because. But it was also a realization that in a second things can be taken like this. I can't take this for granted, what I'm able to hear, because in a minute it can be gone.
And I just. I was just talking to the Lord. I didn't know what to do. I was doing everything I knew to do. I took some supplements, I did some things. You know, it was a very stressful season for me as well, which didn't help, I don't think. But I just finally kind of cried out to God and said, what. What do I do? You know, and what is it that's going on? What do I need to eat? What. Not don't I need to eat? What do I need to watch out for?
And he Told me I had to get rid of the caffeine. Caffeine was causing big problems for me. Yeah, they crashed and you know, it would make me crash. It wouldn't really, it doesn't. We think it lifts us up and keeps us going, but it doesn't really. That's kind of a lie. So. Yes, that was one of the first things. And I'm like, oh, I love coffee. So, you know. And then there's the sugar stuff. Sugar just totally throws me off, steals energy. My body just does not function well.
So he was pointing out the big things and you know, I was kind of, I don't know, you know, like to think about doing that on a regular basis. Especially with, you know, you think about summer, you're in a picnics, you're in these, all these situations where it's constantly in front of you too. Yeah. And he asked me the question, do you want to be well? And not just do I want to be well, but do I want to live well? And I really feel like it's a preparation for this next season is if I'm going to do that season well, then I'm going to have to do the things he's telling me to do. And, and because I go deep with everything, then he really started to bring that into the spiritual perspective for me and, and we started talking about that. But that, that's been pretty hard for me. But I have given up the caffeine and my brother in law and sister in law actually introduced me to herbal coffee. So it's herbal, it's just herbs, it's healthy, you know, it's not the exact same thing as coffee, but it's got prebiotics and stuff. So. Yeah, I love that even when God says no, he gives us some little things along the way to still enjoy, you know, I mean like that was the question. It was do I want to be well? And I've had to really put that into everyday life and it's been challenging, but it's been the best thing for me and it's been so freeing for me.
[00:07:01] Speaker A: Yeah. When you were crying out to him saying how can I fix all these things? And he tells you or gives you this question, not even an answer, Right. But he asks you a question, what was your honest reaction when, when you heard that from him?
[00:07:16] Speaker B: Well, I wrestled with it, you know, a little bit. I'm like, how am I going to do this?
I think that was one of my first instinctive reactions was how am I going to do this?
Especially when you're around people who compromise on this all the time. I believe we can have moderation, but I think moderation turns into compromise and then compromise turns into lifestyles, and that's the problem.
We can say we're doing moderation all day long, but the reality is it really is compromise and it usually leads to falling out of the lifestyles that we are trying to be in. So, yeah, it was more that, like, how am I going to do that? And then the reminder that he's not asking me to do this myself. Yeah, he's gonna walk with me in this and he's gonna give me the strength to do it. I think one of the scriptures I've really been leaning on in the season is the one about how he gives us everything that we need to live this life. And not to just live this life, but to live it well in obedience to Him.
So I've been saying that in the mornings. I've been saying that I get up, I'm like, you've given me everything that I need to do things well today. And that. That has been helping.
[00:08:30] Speaker A: That's amazing. Did you find it confronting or comforting or maybe both, when, when instead of giving you the answers that you wanted, he asked you a question? Because you mentioned in John 5 the story of the man at the pool in Bethesda, and Jesus didn't ask him if he had been sick. He. He asked him how long he had been there. And so then he asks you, or asks the, the. The guy, do you want to be made well, which sounds the same. Like, of course we want to be.
Of course we want to be made well. But God has a. An interesting way of, of having us really confront our own questions. I think the better thing is when, when he asks you this or when he asks us questions, it's not because he obviously he. He already knows the answer. He's asking us for us to realize, do you want what I'm going to give you? But then even maybe a silent question that's. That's inside of that is that are you willing to do the things that are going to be required to be made?
[00:09:40] Speaker B: Well, yeah, I love when he does that, actually, because it does make me think about that. Because again, it's our choice. He gives us free will. He gives us a choice.
So I have a choice right now whether I'm going to follow him in this.
I'm asking him for the answer. He's telling me what I need. Am I going to be willing to follow him in this? And isn't that the. I mean, that's for everything. Are we willing to follow him where he wants to take us? And I want to go where he's leading. So that makes it a little easier for me because at this point, we've gone through enough together where I'm like, okay, I know where he's leading me. Good.
[00:10:25] Speaker A: Yeah. And I think it's such a. An important question, and it matters that he wants to know what we think. But, I mean, honestly, he's. He's just trying to get us to understand, to come into agreement with him, because he, He. He knows it. But. So as you're. As you're walking through this, I'm sure that our friends are wondering what.
What kind of grace did you see as you're walking through this? Like, were there moments where obedience felt hard? Or in your obedience to say yes, has it just been easy and peaceful?
[00:11:01] Speaker B: It's definite. Obedience has been hard to do. But because of how I feel physically and spiritually, when I do the things I need to do to be well, that's where I want to be.
It really is a renewing of the mind. I feel like in the process that as I obey and the more I obey, the more I do it, it's easier to say yes to what's going to keep me well than, you know, to go. I mean, and when the cravings come and I try some things, I'm reminded again that those things are not good for me. And it's, you know, my body doesn't feel good, and I'm like, this is why he's telling me to do what I do. And I just have to be really strict with this. And. Yeah, but it be. It's easy. It's. It's easy because I know I'm going to feel better. It's easy because. And I want to feel better. I want to be well. I do want to be well. So. And I want to.
I don't want to miss what he has for me in this season either. And if that's what it takes to be present and to be in this season where he has me and to do what he's calling me to do, then I'm willing to do the hard things. I think that's what I've come to.
[00:12:15] Speaker A: Yeah. And I think it's such a great reminder, too, because I think far too often we want to only stay in the comfortable, and we want to do the things that make us feel good. And in order to get to the next level, to move to the next season, sometimes The Lord does bring us through harder things, things that question why we're even here or do we even want it? And it is uncomfortable. But as you and I know, it's always worth it. And hopefully our friends listening, they. They see that it's always worth it as well.
And to go back to that, that verse in John, you know, after he healed, after the man was healed, Jesus told him, he said, hey, see you are well. Stop sinning or something worse may happen to you. Which is such a sobering, sobering, it loving moment. It's like Jesus is saying, don't go back to what kept you stuck. And I think that that's what we need to remember, is that when the Lord calls us out of things, he's saying, don't go back to that because you were stuck and you weren't happy there. And while it might feel comfortable being stuck because that's what you know, it's not where you need to stay. And so how did, how did God begin showing you some of what you needed to release physically and how that mirrored that? Sometimes we hold onto that spiritually?
[00:13:36] Speaker B: Well, it. I needed to release worrying about what other people around me thought, you know, because you get a lot of the comments, well, it's only this or it's only that, you know, and they're eating it all, you know, and people pleasing, as we've talked about in the past, has been a struggle for me over the years. I've had to really, really fully release that because it can't matter what everyone else is doing. It can't matter if they can have it or they're having it and they shouldn't. And in that moment, then I have the choice to make for me. And if that gives me a little, you know, if I get some stuff for it, then I guess I get some stuff for it.
People give me a hard time sometimes, so I've had to kind of release that. And, yeah, the truth is that I may not be able to eat some of these things ever again. I feel like those are things in different seasons that as seasons change and as we get older, that I've had to do that, you know, whether it's with our kids, with relationships, with ministries, it's when the season's done, then we have to release it and let it go.
And sometimes those are things that won't ever come back before we go home with him.
And that's. That's been a hard release sometimes.
But to know that he's better, what he has for me is better than Anything that I could have here on Earth, I really think that that's been cemented in my heart, like, it doesn't matter.
You know, I will miss some of those things because they've been great, and I really enjoyed them along the way. But if they're not part of keeping me healthy in this season, then I need to be willing to release that. And I think that is hard release, and that is in. In with the physical, but also the spiritual, you know, and in our walk with him, there are things he asked us to let go of along the way for the sake of something better. And so I think I've had to do a lot of that.
[00:15:41] Speaker A: Yeah, you make a great point, because I think that we have to ask ourselves, what. What am I willing to give up that's harming me spiritually in order to live whole? And what he wants it to be. Maybe it is compromise. Maybe it's anxiety. Maybe it's like you were saying, those tiny, oh, it won't matter decisions. But we have to make the decision not to go back, because if God has called us out of that, we don't want to be like the Israelites and. And, you know, walking into the promised land, complaining about what could be, because he's brought us out of it. And so how did.
How did the obedience when you said yes bring you, Begin to bring you that peace, even before the circumstances felt perfect? Because I can imagine that it probably wasn't just, yes, Lord, I want to be well, and I'll do everything that you want. And then it was just peachy. But, I mean, you've. You've kind of touched on it. But I'm. I'm wondering, like, even before things felt perfect, and I use air quotes for that, you know, what. What did that. What did that feel like?
[00:16:43] Speaker B: You know, you have to trust, because it doesn't. Nothing with any of this is usually immediate, you know, so when you start giving up these things, things kind of feel the same at first. You. It. It takes a little bit, a few weeks, a month, even more sometimes. And I think I just was resting. I mean, I was wrestling with my flesh. You know, it's really not even wrestling with wanting to do it or wanting to be well or to be in that place of wellness, but it's the flesh we're constantly fighting.
So I think the wrestle with the flesh was the hardest in the beginning, you know, like. Or when the cravings come up. It doesn't happen a ton, but sometimes it does. You know, when stress comes, then, you know, if you're typically going to one thing or the other, which stress really would be a trigger for me for some of these things. So you recognize your triggers too. So I was learning a lot of that. So I had to kind of ride the wave of the triggers a little bit and. But yet there was peace. I was telling someone this the other day, actually.
It's like, it's. You can feel the separation of your spirit and your flesh. And I don't know if that sounds confusing to people, but it's like I can feel the peace that God's giving me, you know, but the underlying. There's the underlying anxiety or the underlying frustration, you know, like the kid who wants the candy and his mom says, no, you know, kind of thing. Yes, you know, kind of attitude there.
But what I've realized is, is that God's peace is the one leading, so his spirit is leading me. When we walk in the spirit, it's a whole different experience.
If I'm walking in my flesh, then I'm giving in more. I'm angry, you know, frustrated more. But I feel like he's really teaching me how to live in that peace and that rest resting in him place. And, you know, that was a little rocky at first, but it seemed like it quickly kind of just settled and it. I have to check myself because I don't. I used to live in a lot of anxiety and depression and things. And I'm just sitting there, I'm like, okay, everything feels peaceful. Like, I feel it underlying, but I'm peaceful and I'm like, this is different. This is different.
[00:19:05] Speaker A: Yeah. Oh, that's so good. That's so good. How can a woman move from that stuck to a forward motion? Because you mentioned to me earlier that you want women to walk away asking themselves what areas they've been living in survival mode or stuck or defeated. So what can they do to begin moving from one to the to the next?
[00:19:27] Speaker B: Well, I think the first step really is to bring it to God. I think we have to ask him. I had to ask him. Where. I didn't even know where to begin, really. Sometimes we just know we're stuck somewhere or we know that this just isn't. We're not in the right place.
And I think the place to start is bringing it to the Lord and asking him, because he's so faithful, to show us. And he puts people in your path who will confirm those things or to mentor you even, or give you advice.
You know, people who have been through the season before gave me some advice on different things to try and all those things. Yeah. And I had to do everything naturally because with the medicines, just mess with my mapping, but bring it to the Lord, really spend some time there.
And it's not He. He's faithful to answer. Not everything's immediate. Pay attention. Keep your eyes open, you know, and your ears open.
Because he's constantly showing us something, speaking to us somehow, whether it's through the friend or through the mentor or through the podcast, you know.
[00:20:35] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:20:36] Speaker B: So. And then, you know, really find someone that you can trust to pray with, to. To be praying alongside you, because community is so important in this.
If I was trying to do it by myself, it would be a lot harder. I mean, I have. We have the Lord, and that's the most important, but he's also created us for one another in those relationships, and he's given us each other to walk with in these places. So I think those are the. The main things.
[00:21:02] Speaker A: Yeah, that's. That's great. And, you know, it makes me think, like, if. If God were to. If I were to ask God this, I guess it would be him asking me if he was going to ask me, do you want to be made? Well, because I've been going through. And I've talked about this several times on here, I've been going through a lot of health issues, and I keep asking the Lord, what do I need to do? What do I need to not do? Do I need to remove something? Doing? I need to add a spiritual discipline? Do I need accountability? Do I need to surrender something? It's just there's so many questions that I have on that side. So if. If our friend's listening, if she hears God asking her, do you want to be made? Well, what are some practical steps that. That she can take to. To know what to do next?
[00:21:45] Speaker B: Well, I mean, look, you have to look at what you're doing, too. I think taking a look at what you're doing, what you're involved in, your activities, what are you eating? Sometimes I don't think we even know what we're taking in. And you can take that as physical or spiritual, because what are we putting into our minds? What are we allowing into our hearts? So I think we have to get a really good, clear picture. I think that's a practical step because we have to really know what we're taking in.
And then to bring those to God too, and to His Word and look and see. Are these healthy things for me, is this season.
You know, we have to evaluate our seasons too, because Sometimes when I'm transitioning a season, I don't always know that. And what my mistake has been sometimes is keeping, you know, taking things from the last season into the new season.
So we have to kind of look at that, too. Has the season changed? If the season's changed? Maybe some of these things over here don't need to go into the next season with us. And that can be hard, but that is something I've had to do recently, too. And then make steps to move forward in that, the accountability, just having a friend to pray along with you, you know, all of those kind of things so that you can move forward in what he's calling you to do and you're letting go of the things you need to be and not getting stuck back. Stuck into where you were before.
[00:23:18] Speaker A: Yeah. And just another reminder and something that you just said, not always does this happen immediately. Not always do we feel the peace immediately? Not always. When we ask the questions, does he answer immediately? Because I think sometimes it's because he needs us to look back and see where have we been? And just like you said, look and see what are we doing now that needs to change? Like what. What is bringing us to even ask this question in the first place? And I, I am a huge proponent into journaling pen to paper and writing everything down, which helps you to be able to look back and go, okay, where, where was I? What do I need to learn? And what things, like you said, do I need to leave into that season? And which things do I need to, you know, that I've learned from, that I can now take into this next season? So good. So good. Desiree, thank you so much for being here. This has been such a very needed conversation, I think, and in this times. And so before we close, I want to ask you the question that I ask every guest on the podcast. And that is, what is one perspective that you would encourage listeners to apply today?
[00:24:26] Speaker B: I think that the perspective that God is bringing some, that he's bringing us somewhere wonderful and fruitful, I think, because that gives me the perspective that I'm not losing something. I'm moving towards something better. And that helps me to remind myself how much he loves me, that he does have those great plans for me and he's completing the work he's starting in me.
[00:24:49] Speaker A: Yeah, I mean, that's exactly the perspective that we need to take in all of our transferring of seasons. So beautiful, beautiful friend. If you have been in survival mode, if you've been compromising in small ways, or if you've been stuck in defeat or just managing. Maybe today is the day that you hear Jesus asking you gently but clearly, do you want to be made? Well, not shaming, not condemning, but inviting that obedience that may feel costly in the moment, but it leads to freedom. And if you're listening and you feel that little nudge on your heart, maybe you'd like to share a story that you have, or something that God has been walking you through, or a perspective that you could share with someone else. You don't have to keep it to yourself. I would love to invite you to be a guest on the podcast. You don't have to have everything perfectly together. You just have to be willing to share honestly and let God use your story. Because the truth is, what you've been walking through could be exactly what someone else needs to hear right now. So if that's you, reach out to me at perspectives into practice.com and I would love to hear from you. And remember, even small shifts in perspective can lead to big changes. Now go put those perspectives into practice. Talk to you next time.
