[00:00:01] Jessica: Hey, friend. Welcome to Perspectives into Practice, a place where life's stories meet practical wisdom. Together, we'll explore how faith filled perspectives can transform the way we live, love and grow.
So grab a seat, settle in, and join us on this journey to turn inspiration into action.
Let's dive in foreign.
Welcome back to Perspectives into Practice. If you've been listening for a while, you may have noticed something that I have noticed too. And that's the idea of trusting God. When we don't know what comes next, it just keeps showing up. In each of these conversations, we've got different women, different circumstances, different seasons. But again and again, God seems to be reminding us that we don't need the whole plan to follow him. And I don't think that that is just something that we need to rush past just because we've talked about it before. This is Perspectives into Practice and every person has a different perspective. So maybe God keeps bringing us back to this because we need that reminder. My new friend Dara is living this right now. Some things that she's prayed about are just beginning to take shape and she still doesn't even know how it's all going to work out. But, but instead of waiting until the story is finished, this is my favorite part. She is talking to the Lord and asking him what he's doing. And we get to talk about that, and we get to talk about what it looks like to trust him when it's still unfolding. Because I think that that's sometimes a whole, a whole lot easier to talk about than just trusting God when you're looking backwards, when we don't know how it's worked out, when the prayer hasn't been answered, or when we finally see, see what God is doing. So God is teaching Dara that she does not need to have the entire plan. She can trust him in the next step. And so maybe that's a reminder for us too. Welcome, Dara. I'm so glad that you're here.
[00:02:00] Dara: Thank you so much, Jessica. I'm so glad to be here too. Hello, everyone.
[00:02:06] Jessica: Oh my goodness. I'm, I'm really looking forward to this. We have already been chatting before we even pressed record and it was amazing. And so I just can't, I can't wait to dive in. But before we do that, y' all know I love a good fun fact. And Dara, you told me that you're always looking for the warmest spot in the room. So if you had a sauna, you probably live there, which I definitely don't suggest that you might dehydrate. But I need to know. So, like, when you walk into a room, do you just immediately start scouting for a heat vent or a window or a blanket? Like, has your family accepted this? What's the deal?
[00:02:43] Dara: Yes.
So my family has accepted that I'm probably the coldest person in the house at all times. And it doesn't matter what season, whether it's summer, winter, spring, I'm always cold. And yes, when I walk into a room, I am looking for the blanket.
I am looking for a blanket. My son just asked me today, I was walking down to the basement in the laundry room, and he was like, are you going somewhere? And I was like, no. He was like, you just still have your socks and shoes on. I said, that's to keep my feet warm because if not, I'm going to try to find a heater.
[00:03:20] Jessica: Exactly.
[00:03:21] Dara: You know, I've managed to get a few things in my arsenal over the years, like keeping my socks and shoes on when I come home. If I'm not getting in the bed, and I don't like to get in the bed after I've been outside. That's just a pet peeve of mine. Like, I have to have been in the shower, and then I don't want to touch the outside air. But that's a whole different crazy, I feel you after I have showered. I do not want to touch any outside air. So if it's something in the garage, okay, okay, that's fair.
[00:03:52] Jessica: Because outside is dirty and your inside is clean. And never the two shall mix. I mean, I'm with you. I'm with you.
[00:03:59] Dara: And that's how I feel like. So if I'm coming in from outside, say, I went to the post office today. I went to the gym and then to the grocery store. I'm not. Nine times out of 10, I'm not going to touch my bed unless I have taken a shower and I'm in for the day. But if I've taken a shower, I am in for the day. And if I still have to go out and get my daughter or do something like that, I'm not in for the day. So it's. It's all these different things that are, you know, that have to go right in my day. But heat is. The heat is probably the first.
[00:04:30] Jessica: Stay warm. Yes, stay warm. I love, you know, I love fun facts and learning about. And it just tells. It tells us so much about each person. And I just think that's. That's so, so fun. So much fun.
So I Want to shift from light heartedness about who you are and into what God is doing right now. So because your season is still unfolding and I just, I love that we're talking about this. I call it in the messy middle because we don't know, you know, the full picture yet. And you are learning what it looks like to trust him with the next step. And like I said at the beginning, like this has just been a common theme we have heard over and over. And I just love hearing how God is working through each person's life in the middle, waiting for that next step. And so I just want to start with where you are right now. So what feels different about this season compared to the one that you were in before?
[00:05:22] Dara: Oh my gosh. So this season is so totally different. Because my kids are a different age, they are actually adults.
And because they are adults, it's a different feel. Like not having to call the school when they're absent, not having to be there for certain events and band recital and games or anything like that.
It's very different. And this season of trusting is different.
The relationship between God and I are different.
As far as another level of trust, a deeper level of faith, it's always different. Because although we are technically, and I'm putting up air quotes, empty nesters, our house is not empty.
[00:06:09] Jessica: I heard that.
[00:06:10] Dara: Yeah, correct, correct.
So it's really, really different right now. But when they were smaller, I think it was just very different because they, they conceptualize things different. They did not overanalyze. They did not.
You don't see like a child walking around thinking about what other people think about them. That's not the case of a child. Like a child is free. You know, they're in their cute little body and if they have some food, they're all right. They don't have any worries, any issues.
But you know, young adults and as we get older, we come into so many different things and we come into so many aspects of knowledge. I'll say that. And because we have so many venues or locations or places that are distributing information or what is assumed to be knowledge, they have to filter out to see what is true and what is not, what is right and what is wrong and what they want their life to look like. So it is really different for me in this season, especially just seeing how God is structuring our paths, my path and their path, and just to see how all of that is lining up. So it's different.
But I am learning more about who God is. And I think that's the whole point. Every day of walking with him is learning more about him because he knows all about us, right? He knows us more than we know ourselves. So it's the learning more about him that. That is endless. We'll never know all of who God is.
[00:07:48] Jessica: Exactly. You're exactly right. And when we're in the the middle, where we don't know what that next step is or what it's going to look like, and we do just have to trust him, that's. That unknown is kind of scary. And so what. What part of the unknown for you has required you to trust more?
[00:08:07] Dara: I would say in the area of career and business, I would say it's required me to trust him more because I am impatient. Not proud of it, but I am impatient.
And I want God to do it right now. God, like, can you do it yesterday? Like, I know I just thought of it at this moment, but could you already have done it?
[00:08:27] Jessica: Girl, I'm with you.
[00:08:30] Dara: So it's the patience and following his lead and slowing down and resting in his word. That is what is very different for me in this season in that aspect, because there is so much to be said about someone that just rests in God's word, like full rest. Full, complete. You know how when you're laying across the table and you're laying across the massage table, I think that's the most rested you can get. Like your whole body is fully relaxed. And that's what I mean by fully resting in God's word. Or if you're floating in a pool and you're just head up, back and. And you're just floating on that water like that's the rest I'm talking about. And that kind of rest, it does something to you. It actually, I feel like it gives you strength and it gives you courage for the next thing that comes along because you can look back and reflect and say, well, God handled it last time.
It's a reassurance. God handled it last time. He's going to handle it this time, and he's going to handle it the time after that.
So it takes away that, that pressure, that anxiety, that impatience to have everything now when we fully rest in Him. And so that's. That's really what I'm sitting in and working towards this season in that career area.
[00:09:54] Jessica: I love that so much. Especially just the rest, like true, true rest, because the Bible talks about it all the time, that we should rest in him, that we should lean on him and lean not in on our own understandings. And Trust him in all of our ways. Like, yeah, it tells us what we're supposed to do. But, you know, maybe it's just you and I over here that are trying to force an issue that's not supposed to be and ask God for the whole timeline and every single puzzle piece and the picture on the box.
[00:10:22] Dara: Right, right.
[00:10:24] Jessica: But that's just. Just not how he works. And, you know, that's right on the other side of it, though, because I've seen how he works. I'm so thankful. I'm so thankful that that's not how he works, because if he would have told me all the pieces that would have taken to get to wherever, like, it's just too much, or, well, Lord, I'm not ready. Well, he's like, yeah, I know you weren't ready. That's why I didn't tell you.
[00:10:45] Dara: That's right. Exactly.
[00:10:47] Jessica: That's. That's it. So we try to force. We try to force something that. That isn't supposed to even be. So are. Are you learning or how are you learning to move forward without forcing that type of a clarity with God that He hasn't given you yet?
[00:11:05] Dara: Yeah. So I often reflect on things that he's caught me by surprise at, and I rest in knowing that He's God. Like, so when I.
When I go outside and I look at the earth and I look at the grass, I look at the trees, I look at the bushes, the dirt, everything.
[00:11:27] Jessica: Yeah.
[00:11:28] Dara: It humbles me in the fact that he is God and I am not.
And just the simple, dar, you can't do this. You can't do this outside of Him.
The Bible talks about us doing things alone. And if we're separate from him, we can't do anything alone. And so just the mere fact that he has given me the ability to recognize that I can't do things alone, that I need Him.
I don't think people understand. People say, well, I need him every day. No, I need him every nanosecond of the day. If there's less than a nanosecond, I need him then, too. I need him so much. We have to need Him. Not like our life depends on it, because our life depends on it. That's how much we have to need Him. We have to thirst after Him. There's a scripture in Psalms that talks about, as the deer panted after the water, so does my soul panted after thee, oh, God. That's how we have to want Him. And that takes away. Like I said, that takes away the anxiety. That takes away the impatience. But you have to sit in that. And it's like you have a moment like that and then the world continues to go by and it's like, okay, but you have to stay there, Dara.
You can't continue to just have this moment and just keep on rushing by and zooming by with the rest of your life. And you, there has to be something built in with you that you carry with you that says, God is my center and I'm going to move with him, around him for him and everything that has to do with Him, I'm going to be in step and in line with Him. So that's what my heart's cry is from day to day, that I move in step with God, that I'm aligned with his will, and that even if I get out of line and I miss a line, that I will be like a magnet and I will go back to His Word and I will go back to alignment with his will because that's where I want to be. I want to be in the middle of his will.
[00:13:33] Jessica: Yeah. And I think it's so important to have that foundation even before you get into, you know, even if it's an easy thing that he's guiding you to, but specifically if it's a hard thing that, that we have that foundation, that we know that where do we go when we need guidance to, to his word, to, to the Lord Himself, praying, talking to him all of the time, every moment of every single day. And I think that that's such an important rhythm to have that not everyone implements and not everyone has. So what, what has helped you since you, you seem to have, have that type of rhythm? What's helped you to recognize God's guidance when he's only showing you the next step?
[00:14:18] Dara: Oh, so a couple of things. I would say something that has helped me. One thing has definitely been my husband.
He has been such a source of calming peace to me over these last 20 plus years that he can see when I'm in a fluster or when I'm upset about something or when I can't just go grasp it. He can say, well, if you see this happening, then you see that God is doing this. And if you see this happening, you see that God is doing that.
And it was, it was one time he told me something which was very, very insightful, but it was the simplest thing. I was upset with someone because they shared something or whatever it was. And he said if someone didn't tell you something they didn't want you to know and While it sounds so simple, I was just floored by it. Yeah, I was absolutely and completely floored by it.
And he has those ways of. My husband has those ways of just helping me see things that I can't naturally see by myself. We're total opposites.
[00:15:27] Jessica: I love it.
[00:15:29] Dara: So he can help me see the things that I can't see at times when I should probably be seeing something. But he has been a tremendous help and just my rhythm and routine with having a devotion time every day with God.
Whether it is prayer, whether it is sitting down, just taking a moment and just talking to God silently, whether it is just reading the Bible and just meditating and just eating on whatever it is that he's given me, whether it's revelation, whether it's insight or whether it's. I would definitely say those, those three would be, would be how I have been the most impacted.
[00:16:09] Jessica: Yeah, I love that. I mean, and, and obviously not everyone has a husband, but community, right? We talk about community meeting community so much, especially when you're going through these seasons. Because sometimes we do need people to remind us, hey, if they didn't tell you, you don't need to know.
[00:16:25] Dara: That's right.
[00:16:26] Jessica: You're right. It sounds so simple. But when you get it told to you, you're like, okay, you could have said that nicer.
[00:16:34] Dara: Ow.
[00:16:36] Jessica: But you know, that's the truth.
[00:16:38] Dara: Y.
[00:16:38] Jessica: It is the truth. It is the truth. And you know, those type of, of kind jabs are in the, the word of God as well. He is telling us, you know, they say that the word is a double edged sword. Yeah, it is, it is clear cleaning us out. It is telling us, convicting us, you know, and that that is how we know what to do next. That is how we trust the one who is giving us the next steps instead of just trying to take it over. Because even though hopefully I'm not speaking out of turn for you, but even though we say that we would like to just know all of the steps, I know for me, I do ask the Lord what is the next step? And I do rest in that. And I'm sure you do as well. Like we want to know, we want to know. Maybe I'm a type A. I like to know all of the order and everything. Yes.
And that looks really good. All of the schedules and organization looks really good. But in order to trust that next step, we have to trust who's giving us that next step, who's leading us.
And we have to understand, like you mentioned, that he's a Good, good father. Like, we have to understand that. And so how has your understanding of him being a good father changed through these different seasons of your life?
[00:17:57] Dara: Oh, my gosh. That's a loaded question. I'm going to.
Because changes everything when you know, first of all, that you are God's child and that you know that your parents were your means to get here.
They are not God.
It changes everything that the family that he put you in was not there as an accident, but you were purposefully placed there in your position, in your gender, in your time frame, that you were purposely placed, placed every place that you were. It changed everything. Because then you approach God differently. You don't approach him as some Santa Claus saying, well, if you get me this, I'll do this. You approach him as God. Whatever it is, wherever it is, I want to serve you. You approach him knowing that you have his full love and attention.
It's such a secure feeling to know that God loves you no matter where you are, no matter what you've done.
You can't out bad his love or you can't out. You can't. The Bible says. I'll put it like this. The Bible says there is more grace than singing. His grace abounds more than our sins. Like, how is that possible?
[00:19:32] Jessica: Right?
[00:19:33] Dara: The worst we can do. God still covers that and showers that and loves us more and also gives us a path back to him so we can't fathom how much love he has for us. So it makes me feel so loved to know that he's a good father and that none of this stuff was just.
He wasn't just taking dice and, and rocking them in his hands and throwing them down like, okay, so whatever house you're in, whatever family you're at, whatever country you're at. No, he was so detailed in doing everything he did for us.
So we, we come to God different when we have that, that insight that he is such a good father and good, good is the word that we can use on earth. But there is so many more words we can use. But that's the one that will suffice for now.
Because he's so. He's more than good.
[00:20:28] Jessica: He is so much more than good. But yes, he is. He is everything. And you're right, he doesn't just roll the dice and hope to see what comes out. It is, it is perfectly planned, exactly as it's supposed to be. Even, you know, with our, with our free will to do things. And that's something else that God has been showing you that I want to talk to you about because I feel like there's a different piece. Piece of what he's doing in your life right now. And you told me that you've been spending some time in acts and Acts 14:15 stopped you. And that's when Paul and Barnabas say, we too are only human like you. So I would love to just, just quickly, like, what did God begin showing you through that verse? Because I think that, that this is so important for all of us to hear as we're. We're going through this, this journey through this season with you.
[00:21:18] Dara: Yeah, sure. So, yeah, I've been stuck in the book of Acts. I love Acts 7 and 8. But I've here in Acts 14 and 15, it spoke about being human.
We all, we too are only human. Like you. It talked about the status. Because when we get into the hierarchies and we get into leaderships and occupations and accomplishments and achievements, we get into more of a pyramid or more of a stair step.
And I believe that we are all a circle.
There was a quote that I heard the other day, and I told it to my sister and I thought it was beautiful. It was from the Emmys that were just on tv.
And a young lady wrote someone a card and she said, we're not listed.
We're linked. And I thought that was so beautiful because even in my family, we have oldest and the youngest and there's 19 years apart, different things like that. And I said we are linked, not listed.
And linked means we. We get together and we join in with the person that is next to us and we help them. There's not a hierarchy. We don't have to climb up a ladder to get to a person.
We are linked together. We help each other. Instead of stepping on each other's fingers and toes and heads, we are linked together. So that means that we are all connected. And being connected, we can help each other better than when we feel like we're linked, we're reaching down or we reaching up. When we're, when we're helping each other, we're just helping around the circle. And it makes it very equal.
[00:23:01] Jessica: Yeah, well, and also, you know, being, being human, we do compare ourselves to others. And the Bible does tell us to stay in own lane, stay in our own lane because we can only live the life that we can live. And, you know, we are linked with other people, but that doesn't mean that we're supposed to be right where they are. And I feel like when we're in the middle of the, the next trusting thing. We don't have the next step. It's so easy to constantly measure our lives against someone else. Well, she got her next step or she got her reward or, well, she, she's up there on that stage or whatever it is. And it becomes really difficult to be present with the season, in the season that, that God has. I know for me, for me in. Because I, I want things to move faster. I want to know the next step yesterday, like you said.
And that's, and I think that that is, that is a human thing. But also knowing that we can repent of trying to do it all of ourselves and continually surrender it to the Lord and let it go to him and you know, if we pick it back up, do the same thing again. Right. Like repenting is not just a one time thing, but it's also not a, like we're supposed to turn from it. And sometimes when it is really ingrained in us, it's very difficult to do. But we can trust that the Lord can help us to move, to move forward in that. And so to make this really practical, because I love, I, we love making things practical about that. You said that you're reading God's Word every day and that's one of the things that keeps you grounded and that you're, you know, noticing all of these things and spending time in scripture and prayers. So what can you tell the woman that is in the middle right now and she is comparing herself to others and she knows that, you know, she's got her own plan that God has for her and she's just really struggling right now. What would you want her to know or what would you want someone to tell you in this season?
[00:25:07] Dara: Oh, well, I would first of all want someone to tell me to take a pause and do some evaluating. I think self evaluation is really good because I feel like when we pause, that allows us to hear God more clear.
I feel like we can get clarity when we pause and that can lead us to a better relationship with God, which leads us to better relationships with other humans.
Because in that pause we can pull ourselves out of the chaos, whatever that may be, whether it's really, really working and being busy at your church, whether it's reaching for that next promotion, whether it's taking your kids to a million different activities, pulling yourself back from, from the chaos of life and pausing to see where God would have you be stronger. And I think that's so important because as women we do so much. Yes, we are running. And I, I know I'VE been in the thick of it when my kids were younger.
And asking yourself to be, to stop or pause. It feels like it's a piece of you that's dying, but it's actually some of you that can be revived.
Because we don't even know how we say a dead man walking. We don't even know how dead we are until something happens that makes us stop. And we don't want something like that to have to make us stop. We want to be able to self evaluate and see where we can pull back, see where we can pause, see where we can draw closer to God. Because it's important.
Because you know, the Bible says time and chance happens to us all.
You want to get there before you're forced there.
So you want to get to a place of rest before it feels like it's a forced rest.
And God can speak clearer. You probably can receive it well if you actually see that you need the rest instead of him sitting you down.
And we don't want to live this life so long, so fast, so hard that we don't get to enjoy life until retirement.
And FYI, there is no retirement from Christianity. There's no retirement from our faith.
So that's what I would say to someone. If you can just pause, I wouldn't even say a full stop because I know full stop is scary for some people.
So I would just say pause and do some reviewing, do some self evaluating on yourself, on your activities that you're doing, on your, whether it's your job, your family.
See where you can reset and adjust because that's going to be really necessary for life because you don't want to be forced to be set down.
And then you, then you're angry, then you're angry that you have to sit down and you, and you have a hard time receiving what God could have helped you see if you would have did a little bit of self evaluating before he made you sit down.
[00:28:21] Jessica: Yeah, I think that's so, so, so important because you're right, we don't, we don't do that. And sometimes we do need, I mean, maybe it's just you saying that right now our friend is listening and they, they're like, yeah, okay, I hear you. I'm gonna do that because sometimes we just need to be told, sit down, take a break.
[00:28:41] Dara: Yeah.
[00:28:41] Jessica: Drink some water.
[00:28:42] Dara: Yeah. Take a nap. Right?
Yes.
[00:28:46] Jessica: Sometimes we just need to be told that. And because we're going so busy, we're going, going, going, we're too busy to, to do things. We Think I'm more productive if I stay moving. But honestly, the productivity happens when you take breaks. And that is scientific fact.
[00:29:04] Dara: Yes, it is. Yes, that is absolutely true.
[00:29:09] Jessica: Well, Dara, thank you so much for being here. Thank you for sharing what God is doing in your life in the middle, for telling us that we do need to sit down with that. We do need to go back to our word, that we can trust our very, very good father. And I think that, you know, there's something so powerful about us saying and admitting out loud that I don't know exactly what's going on, but I know God does, and I know who he is in that. And so maybe that's the theme that just keeps coming up, is that we just need that reminder. So thank you so much for being here.
[00:29:45] Dara: Thank you for having me.
[00:29:47] Jessica: Yes. Before we wrap up, I want to ask you the last question that I ask every guest on the podcast, and that is, what is one perspective that you would encourage listeners to apply today?
[00:29:59] Dara: I would say the one perspective would be self assessment.
That would be. The one perspective would be self assessment.
[00:30:07] Jessica: Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. And you. And you. You did a great job explaining it earlier. I love that. I love it so much, friend. Maybe you're in the middle of your own unfinished story right now. You don't know what comes next. You don't have all the answers. And maybe God isn't asking you to figure it all out.
Maybe he's simply asking you to notice where he is, to trust who he is and take the next step that he puts in front of you. If you're looking for a place to share what God is doing while you're still living that story, not just once you have a testimony tied up with a pretty little bow. I'd love to invite you to the Story Haven. It's a free community where we share the real right now. Stories of what God is doing encourage one another and build genuine relationships as we walk it out together. You can join
[email protected] or on any of your mobile devices. And if you have a story of what God is doing in your life right now, I'd love to hear it. You can learn more and reach out to
[email protected] and remember, even small shifts in perspective can lead to big changes. Now go put those perspectives into practice. Talk to you next time.
