[00:00:01] Speaker A: Hey, friend. Welcome to Perspectives into Practice, a place where life's stories meet practical wisdom. Together, we'll explore how faith filled perspectives can transform the way we live, love, and grow.
So grab a seat, settle in, and join us on this journey to turn inspiration into action.
Let's dive in.
[00:00:29] Speaker B: Hey, friend.
[00:00:29] Speaker A: Welcome back to Perspectives into Practice. I'm really looking forward to today's conversation because I think it's one that so many of us quietly walk through. Have you ever felt like you're doing all of the right things in your faith? You're showing up, you're staying consistent, you're checking all the boxes, but something still feels like it's missing, like there's more, but you can't quite reach it. Today's conversation is for that space. I'm sitting down with my new friend Jodi, and what I love about her is her willingness to be honest about where she is right now. Not just where she's been, but what God is doing in her life today. Welcome, Jody. I'm so glad that you're here, Jessica.
[00:01:10] Speaker B: I love the opportunity to be on your show and to meet new friends like yourself and everyone else that's listening today.
[00:01:17] Speaker A: Oh, I love it too. I love meeting new people, which is great about having a podcast because you get to meet them all the time.
[00:01:23] Speaker B: That's right. God is always putting new friends in our faces.
[00:01:28] Speaker A: Yes, he is. Yes, he is. All right, so before we dive in, y' all know I love a good fun fact, and Jody is a huge NFL fan, especially for the 49ers. I am not a football. I don't know anything about football. So my question to you is, what brings you to love the 49ers? Is it, was it start with family, a husband, or something else entirely?
[00:01:52] Speaker B: Well, I think it definitely stems from my son. I have a 32 year old son that lives in Phoenix, Arizona. I live in California. That's why, you know, I got to root for one of the California teams. So we root 49ers. But I think it even stems back to when I was little. My dad was a football and basketball coach and I had an older brother, so I was quite, you know, bit of the tomboy. We didn't have any girls that lived in the neighborhood, so we were always cruising around on bikes and playing cops and robbers and throwing the football around. So sports is just always DNA. In fact, when I go to a Super bowl party, like, I really want to watch the game. I don't want to just sit there and hang out with all the Girls and sitting there chit chatting and eating the food. I'm like, yeah, I'll see you in a couple hours. Like, I really want to see what's going on here with the game. So I'm a d. I love that.
I will watch, really, almost any football team, but when the Niners are on, people know, like, leave her alone. I'm on the couch, I've got my football gear on, and I'm like, let's go.
[00:03:00] Speaker A: Yes. I love that.
Are you one that feels like your encouragement on the other side of the screen definitely helps them on the field, Jessica?
[00:03:09] Speaker B: A thousand percent. I mean, they.
They're like, yes. And they hear my encouragement, so that's why I'm screaming and yelling, because I know they can hear me.
[00:03:19] Speaker A: Absolutely. It's a. It's this wonderful thing that goes through the screen. I love that. And I feel like so many. So many other people, you know, that's. That's their. Their big thing. I. I never had that. That's not true. I have some family members that are die hard Alabama fans because that's where they grew up. And I like the colors that Alabama has, but I don't know anything about it. So if I had to root for someone, that's who it would be. Which is terrible for me, who lives in Tennessee, because that, you know, they're big rivals. But you know what? You just. You do what you can.
All right? So behind that fun fact is a deeper story of growth and surrender and learning what it really means to walk with God. And I am so excited to step into that. So I'd love for you to take us back, Jodi, to this season of your life where you shared with me that you're doing all of the right things, right in quotations, right in your faith, but you still felt empty. So what did that season or does that season look like for you on a daily basis?
[00:04:27] Speaker B: So, yeah, you know, it's really. It's very unsettling because as I mentioned before we started recording, I recently retired. So I've been retired since August. So I thought, okay, maybe I'm feeling out of sorts because I'm not going into the office every day. You know, my schedule is kind of change.
I'm, you know, just feeling off balance. And so when I have all this extra time now, I'm trying to fill it up with, you know, my Bible studies, because I was born and raised Catholic, and so I still have my Catholic Bible studies that I do on Thursday.
But through my daughter and her whole journey, faith Journey and medical journey. She introduced me into the non denominational church, which I love their form of worship. Each church is different, and I just feel like, whatever, you know, take the good and the bad, right?
So I, you know, do my Bible studies on Thursdays with my Catholic group. On Fridays, I'm doing my non denominational Bible study with that group. And I just still felt like something was missing. And I'm doing my, you know, you know, Jesus calling my devotional books in the morning, and I'm checking all this stuff off. You know, I've got them. I, you know, sit down here. I'm like, okay, I got that one done, that one done, that one done. Let's pop into the Bible for a little bit. And then I go about my day, and then at night time, I'm in bed and I'm, you know, thanking God for all the, the blessings.
But what I discovered was, oh, my gosh, like, no, no, no, no, no. That is such a passive faith. It's like, we are just doing these things as activities. We're not really active in that faith, right? Like God. God is always reminding us. And I have this hard thing with the surrender and the. And the control. I want to, like, control everything.
And so I feel like that's what we. Because so much of our time throughout the day is like, controlling all of these situations. And God is like, no, Jody, I've got this, like, I'm controlling the world. What your job is, is to bring my spirit into it.
So don't leave me at the devotionals. Don't leave me after you've read scripture. You bring that into your day and every encounter and everything that you do.
Like, that is what I want. I want all of you. I want the big chunks. I just don't want the time allotted hour to. In your day.
And so, yeah, that just really hit me to the core. I'm like, I. I was like, almost like, apologetic to God. I'm like, oh, my gosh, like, you're outside. I've been doing so much good and, and in the, you know, years following my, my daughter's death in 2018, being that testimonial girl, going from a grief girl into a testimonial girl and showing people how we praise God in the storm and in those difficulties because it's so easy to praise him when everything is going good. So I really thought, Jessica, I was being a Christian, like, I was doing everything and making God proud of me. But I missed the biggest part of it where it's like, he Just wants to be with me all the time. Yeah. And so what does that look like in our busy lives? Right.
We have to be so intentional about that. And really, you know, setting aside the, the time to sit with him and have those conversations and just to have that silence. And I think when you go from working, working, working your whole life, which I had done, I mean, since eight years old at my dad's camp until I just retired at 65, I was just always working and always really super busy. So I was used to that, you know, busyness and that activity. So now having this extra time in my life and more of that time for the quietness, I don't, I shouldn't feel guilty about that. I should really embrace it and go, thank you God for giving me this opportunity to learn how I can grow deeper in my faith. Walk with you. And even though it's uncomfortable, he's walking with me and through it.
[00:09:01] Speaker A: Yeah, I love that. So when did you, when did you actually realize that your faith was more above, above ground, surface level than really deeply rooted?
[00:09:14] Speaker B: I, I feel like, you know, it's it in just reading some of these books recently and talking about our prayer life. And for me, I feel like prayer has always been just one of those things where it's like, you know, thank you God for all of my blessings, thank you for my friends, thank you for my family and just being very surface level about it. But in a couple of books that I've read recently, and one that was in my non denominational Bible study, this book really took me to that next deeper level of being so much more intentional about my prayer, writing down my prayer request.
God knows everything that's in our heart. He actually wants us to ask him for these things. Right. He wants to bless him, he wants to, you know, put all these blessings into our life. But that is a form of communication with Him. And I think so many of us miss that beautiful opportunity to have that deeper rooted relationship with him. Because we don't look at prayer life so significantly. We ingest a lot, we read a lot, but what do we pour out back into Him? And so when I started this prayer log and having deeper prayer conversations with God, it really, it struck me that I definitely was delving into a deeper rooted relationship with him.
[00:10:49] Speaker A: You're right, he does.
So many times in the Bible he tells us, come near to me, come to me, spend time with me. And it's if we are checking these boxes, if we're staying busy in striving to, to keep this relationship Up. It's exhausting, for one, but it's not really what he's asked us to do. He's like, I want you to be still with me. I want you to see what I'm doing. I want you to seek me and to find me with all of your heart. Like, there's so many things that he tells us to do that really is an active way.
But we. We feel like. Like you mentioned it was. You felt like it was like a passive thing, but there's so much that he asks us to do that sounds passive, but it is active. But then we go through the passive way, right? And we're like, well, let's just check up all these boxes. And I feel like this feels like the right thing, but we miss the whole point. And I love that you mentioned that, that time with him, that learning that in our prayer time, it is so, so important. And you mentioned something when we were talking earlier, and you said that God doesn't want your activities. He wants you. And I absolutely love that. So what did that realization change for you?
[00:12:10] Speaker B: Well, you know what? I think that realization changed in me about, you know, faith isn't having all the answers. It's about staying open, staying grounded, trusting that growth is happening even when you can't see it. You know, we talk about in the Bible, faith is built in the waiting. We walk by faith, not by sight, so we don't have to be perfect in front of God's eyes. And I think for me, having those control issues and, you know, again, checking everything off on my boxes, I always felt like I needed to do all of this before I could really get to a deeper relationship with God because I just wasn't clean enough for Him. Like, I had to clean up this department. I had to clean up that department.
And I think it's been so liberating and freeing, understanding that God takes our mess and really brings it into this message and into this, you know, beauty for. For others, I think being raw, being vulnerable. You know, you and I talked before about.
Even with. With my story. You know, I'm so used to having the story that I talk about all the time on podcasts and interviews. But you are asking for it on a different level, like, where I'm at currently, and I'm like, oh, my gosh, I have to, like, really get down and dirty and be vulnerable and expose myself. But that's what we have to do for God, because let's not fool ourselves, Jessica. God knows everything about us, right? I mean, we're not hiding anything from him. So the more that you can just let go of that control of what you feel that you need to look like or show up like to God, then the greater freedom that you have in that relationship and in that walk with him.
[00:14:05] Speaker A: Absolutely. And that's, you know, that's turning that, that polished version of your story into living into a space that really feels unpolished and uncertain. And that surrender is life changing. If we allow it to be right, we can say that we surrender and we say, lord, I want you to do your will in my life. But then we're still holding on so tight to what we think it should look like. And, you know, you've walked through grief and abandonment and so many hard seasons. And so I'm wondering how did that those experiences shape your relationship with God at that time and then, you know, changed it for even to now.
[00:14:47] Speaker B: So if it's okay, I want to share with you. We just came off of Holy Week, so I want to share with you a reflection that I just did recently. It was on the Stations of the Cross and I was asked to speak on the 13th station. And that's where Mary's holding the, the body of Jesus. And it ties into my grief. And it, you all understand how it's brought me to where I am at today. So it says, how has Jesus moved me through grief? When Mary holds the body of Jesus at the 13th station, it's a moment that feels unbearable to even imagine. A mother holding her son and processing love and loss. And yet I understand that moment in a way I never wanted to. When my 22 year old daughter Alex passed away in 2018, I too held her. And in that moment, everything stood still. It was a sacred pause where love and loss coexisted. But God met me there and helped me to honor and love my child. Through the raw pain that I felt, I learned that I grieved hard because I loved hard. And love never disappears just because someone is gone. It takes on a whole new meaning. And this was shown to me so beautifully through Alex's parting gift.
When she lifted her head from her pillow and looked up to heaven and opened her eyes and smiled that big, beautiful smiles of hers for the last time. And then she had passed. And in that moment, my daughter showed me that she was back home with her heavenly father. And though as a mother, that was my deepest sorrow to let her go, I realized it was her greatest joy.
And so in that moment, God pivoted me from a grieving mother to a testimonial I turned my pain into purpose through Alex's foundation, through writing my book, and through speaking life into others who are walking through unimaginable loss. Just as love held Mary at the cross, love is what carries me through. Because, you see, grief is not the end of my story.
Love is so that is how God was able to get me through that darkest time in my life.
And he allowed me to grow my faith during that darkest moment.
And now I feel like he's the best word that I can use for it is recalibrating my faith, which Paul is in. Recalibrating. And so that is what he's doing now in my current season. He's taking me from that hard moment where he watched me lose Alex, and now he's taking me to this greater purpose and calling in my life where it's truly all about him and redesigning my life, allowing me to retire, allowing me to have, you know, more time in my day for him. So sharing, you know, my story, but just bringing him more intentional into that.
[00:17:57] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:17:57] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:17:58] Speaker A: Oh, that is beautiful. Thank you so much for sharing that part of your story. And I, I'm sure that there are so many women listening that maybe can't relate fully to it, but they can see theirselves in that and that, you know, God is meeting you in that personal and real way. And I'm, I'm just, I love that. I love that so much. And so when you, when you surrendered those things, when you said God, I know that this is not the way that it's meant to be. Take me back to, to you.
What does that look like right now in a day to day, real moments, not just the big ones, but in a, in a practical way. What does that look like today for you?
[00:18:43] Speaker B: So what it looks like today for me is basically leaning into this calling that he has for me. And I'm still uncovering it, Jessica. I'm still unpacking it. Yeah. Everyone that I have spoken to in the last couple of months, they look at me and they say, Jody, something is changing in you. I see it. I feel it. Your servant's heart, your love of God, your ministry of just wanting to be with, you know, other Christians, other, you know, faith filled individuals. Like, he's swirling in me right now. So I wish I could tell you exactly what that all entails other than, you know, how I'm showing up and still, you know, having my testimonial, being grounded in his word, being more intentional in my prayer life, creating that space, that quietness as He Keeps pouring more and more of his heart into me, his soul into me for a greater purpose. Like, I look back at when I lost Alex and what my life looked like then. And little did I know how he would catapult me to where I'm at today, where I speak to so many individuals about faith and about my journey. But you know what I'm finding out, Jessica? My story isn't over yet. I mean, God is still writing, right? And I think it's really important for everyone who's listening today to realize that. Don't let you know situations in your life put you on pause and think, this is it. This is all I have.
Because God truly has so much more to do in your life, and I'm a true testimony of that. And I'd love to come back in a year's time and say, Jessica, remember when I was on your podcast and, you know, you asked, what specifically is he doing? And I said, I'm not really clear on it, but, boy, things are moving and swirling, and people are telling me that I'm changed. I think that is the greatest compliment that we as followers and we as Christians can get from other people when they see that something is different in us, that we are shining this bright light and they want it, too. And they're like, hey, what are you doing? And I'm like, I wish I had the secret sauce to tell you, but I'm just really like, that relationship with God.
So, hey, try it. And, you know, it looks different for everybody, but this is kind of what it looks like for me right now, just spending time with Him. And so many people I know kind of get nervous about that. Like, when you say, just sit in a quiet room, like, give yourself a timeout, like, just close the doors, windows, lock yourself in somewhere and just sit there. And it will be uncomfortable at first, but the more that you do it, I think the more that you're going to be able to listen to what he has designed for you and don't get frustrated because it's not going to happen all at once. Right? So many people I know in Bible study.
[00:22:00] Speaker A: Oh, for sure.
[00:22:01] Speaker B: Oh, my gosh, yes. You know, God speaks to me all the time, and we have all these great conversations, and then there's other women that are like, well, God's never spoken to me. Like, what's wrong with me? I mean, God speaks to all of us differently and at different times. So don't measure someone else's conversation, you know, with. With God and what's happening in their lives. With your faith because God takes everybody through faith at different times.
[00:22:25] Speaker A: Absolutely. I often say you got to stay in your lane because we're. We're all running this race and we all have to stay in our own lanes because God has a purpose and a plan for each one of us, and it is different and we are at different levels of that race. So it's us against us, not me against you. And we do. You're right. We do need to remind. Remember that and, and remind ourselves that God's working with each of us individually and he will. He will share those things and reveal them as they come. And you actually mentioned earlier that this season has been revealing both hard truths and hidden strengths for you. And so I wonder, has God shown you something about yourself that was surprising in this season?
[00:23:14] Speaker B: Yes, I think, you know, I, I touched on it a little bit. I. I always had thought that I had this really great pure faith journey with him. I thought I had a really good relationship with him because I was saying my prayers and I was, you know, doing all these things that I, you know, thought he wanted of me.
You know, all these activities. And I was really stunned and shocked when have that realization that. Jody, that's just so cosmetic. No, no, no, no. Like, you're not getting it. Those are just all action things. Like, he just wants more of you, and you are the one that has to be receptive to that and to open up your heart and allow him to fill your heart with more of his word and more of his love and more of his. What he wants out of you. It's. It's not about you. And, you know, our egos are so big and it, you know, pairs right up with that whole control.
So as a type a person that's very project oriented and like, you know, always checking off things. That was really hard for me to have to turn my personality around and realize, wow, okay, like God, I need to take a. A back seat. I just really need you to guide me in this. I need to, like you said in your prayer earlier, to silence and to shut my mouth, open up my ears, and to receive that message. And that was a hard pill for me to swallow because I thought, oh, gosh, everyone says I'm, you know, such a. A good person, I'm such a good Christian and look at everything that you've been through and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, how you still show up.
But I wasn't really showing up how God wanted me to show up. I was showing up externally.
[00:25:07] Speaker A: Yeah, I feel like that performance for us, type A personalities comes out strong, and we go, great. We're doing all the right things. And from the outside, it looks beautiful. And I love that word cosmetic, because that's exactly what that is in that time is. It's just putting makeup on what we think is right. And it's like, wow, that is beautiful.
However, what is more beautiful is when we truly abide in Him. And, you know, the Bible says, abide in me, and I in you. And that is not just checking the boxes, right? That's not just reading your Bible and going to all the Bible studies, but it truly is spending that quiet time with him, which you're right. It is scary for those that aren't used to it, and it's scary sometimes for me because I know that there's things that I need answers to, and I don't really know if I want them, because I know that that means conviction, and I know that means repentance and turning away. And sometimes in our sin or in the things that we're doing or the new seasons that he's taking us into, it's going to require refining. And sometimes I don't want to sit quietly with him, if I'm being honest, because that refining means a lot of change and discomfort. And I think that we don't. We don't like that.
We don't like that at all.
[00:26:29] Speaker B: And, and that's what, you know, I, I. And I think that's where I was so stunned by this realization, because my whole life, I had built up so much resilience and so much refinement in my. My whole faith journey. I mean, just everything that I had been through, you know, being born to a single mother and then being put in foster care and then being adopted and having, you know, two parents that both fought alcoholism and then divorce, bankrupt, and all these things, and then the. The real hard one, obviously, you know, losing my daughter. So I thought, okay, God, like, you have walked me through all these seasons in my life, and I thought that you had finally refined me to the. The person that you wanted me to be. So now, at 65, in this last leg of my life, I've got to be refined all over again. Like, I still, like, I feel like we're all, you know, these pieces of clay where he keeps molding us and shaping us, and we, you know, get so rigid. We're like, no, no, no, no. Like, I don't want to have to do that again, because that was a lot of hard work. And look at where I'm at right now.
Good enough. And he's like, oh, my daughter, no, no, no, no. You can still be so much better. You have no idea. Yeah. Everything that I still want to do for you and through you and with you.
So it's really that surrendering. I say every morning that you get up, we have to surrender again because we just want to be able to, you know, control the whole day. But yeah, it's. We just have to really lean into that. And I love what you said about the refinement because I think so many of us are. Are scared. We work so hard at this picture of who we are today and it's like, oh gosh, like I still have to keep doing work. When can I just sit back and coast for real?
[00:28:25] Speaker A: Oh, man, wouldn't that be nice? Well, you know what? One day when we get to heaven, it will all be worth it and we will get to coast, but we also get to spend eternity with the Lord and know that everything that we've done here is worthwhile. And you know, we're storing up treasures in heaven. And that's something that I think that we often forget is that when he's bringing us through these things, these are not just for us. We are storing up those things in heaven. And when we share our stories vulnerably and transparently, it literally could be a life or death situation for you sharing this for someone else. And I mean life or death, not in physical, but also in that their eternity, they could. There could be something that you share or that plants a seed.
[00:29:15] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:29:16] Speaker A: That literally changes their life. And so who are we to say, well, I don't need to share that part of my story. The Lord says, I need you to give it all to me and I'm going to do with it what I need to and it will be for my glory and your good in Jesus name. Man. That's.
[00:29:34] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, that's it. Yep. And you know, it's easier said than done, right?
[00:29:39] Speaker A: Oh, for sure. Oh, for sure. Yes. I have had many and so many people that I talk with on here that we just. We all go through these things and not always do we want to share them. And they're not always pretty or packaged. Right. And there's a lot of women that come on here and they're like, hey, I'm still in the middle of this. And even you were saying, like, I'm still in the middle of this. I don't have it all wrapped up in a bow. And. And I love that because we need to hear other people's middles, because not everything is wrapped up. And if we only hear the wrapped up, perfect, polished testimonies, how are we supposed to, you know, live that out if we're still in the messy middle? And so I'm. I'm so thankful for you, Jodi. I'm thankful for this conversation. I'm thankful for your willingness to even come here and share right now where you are. And I know. I know that this is going to meet so many women exactly where they are as they're listening.
So before we wrap up, I want to ask you a question that I ask everyone on this podcast, and that is, what is one perspective that you would encourage listeners to apply today?
[00:30:42] Speaker B: So the one perspective that I would encourage everyone to apply today is this whole topic that we talked about with the control and, you know, how God is telling us, it's my world. I don't need you to control it. What your role is to put my spirit in it. So think about that. How do we put our spirit in it? How are we showing up for him? How are we showing up for others? How are we showing up for our faith? When we are going through easy times in our life and joyful times, it is so easy to be like, oh, I love God. Isn't God good? And. But when you're going through those really tough times, that is when it's even, you know, that much more challenging. But God wants us to be showing up in those times as well.
And, you know, with the. The rawness and the vulnerability and being like, you know what, God, this really sucks right now. I lost a job. I, you know, lost a friend. But I'm still going to praise you because, God, you are good all the time. And he promised us, you know, hey, life is not going to be easy, but you will get through it. And by the grace of God. Jessica, I'm talking to you today, and I have gotten through it. So, you know, I just want people to. To remember that and to ask themselves every day, how are they showing up?
[00:32:08] Speaker A: That's beautiful. Beautiful. Thank you so much. Jody. If today's conversation spoke to you, take a moment to reflect. Maybe God's asking you, are you giving me your checklist or are you giving me your heart? You don't have to have it all figured out. You just have to be willing to take one step closer and surrender to the Lord. If this episode encouraged you, share it with a friend who might need it, too.
And always, always, always know that if you have a story to share, I would love to talk with you. Reach out to
[email protected] and we will get you on here so that you can share what God is doing in your life too. And remember, even small shifts in perspective can lead to big changes. Now go put those perspectives into practice. Talk to you next time.
